We used to call it the tombstone game (or the obituary game) and i think I’ve referred to it before. When I was younger I would play it with friends when there wasn’t much else going on. We would sit outside and watch the sunset/ or the stars — and on a couple of occasions we saw the whole cycle. Sunsets/stars and sunrise — the tombstone game has the potential to last for days!!!
1] first, you try to come up with something you would like to see written on your own tombstone: something that sums up your life/ your values/ your being.
2] then, your friends come up with what they think should appear on your tombstone.
The game can teach you a lot about yourself (as you search for the right words/thoughts which can best sum up your life)….it can also be a very revealing game when you see how others see you (and when they see how you picture yourself to be). And knowing who you really are (and how others see you and whether or not those two images are the same) >>>>> is an important part of life.
In previous weeks, the readings have focused our attention on Prayer. To pray continually, to let your whole life be offered up as a prayer to God. Because prayer is being in communication with God.
And to do that we need to:
1] recognize that there is a God
2] believe that God does hear us (each of us) when we pray
3] trust that God will answer our prayers in a way that is best for us.
In other words, in order to pray we first need to know and trust God. This week, our readings add to that – that in order to pray we also need to know ourselves. That to make our spiritual relationship meaningful, we need to know who we are in order to give the relationship our all.
In the parable we heard today, the Pharisee is suffering from an identity crisis. He doesn’t know who he is. On the other hand, the tax collector knows very well who he is, and as a result his prayer is very sincere and effective. The two of them went to the temple to pray. The one looked very religious, but in reality was too self-serving and nit-picky to really be a positive influence. But because he was a pharisee (who specialized in the most minute details of the law) he was viewed by others in the community as being a “respectable” man.
The other pray-er was considered to be the most horrible person: a tax collector. Appointed by Rome// a traitor to the Jews// working at a job which was clearly dishonest and in violation of the Jewish law.
So, really, its not just the Pharisee who has an identity problem….but the whole society in which they lived. The same society in which Jesus lived and taught … So you can just imagine the shock and outrage of those listening to Jesus when the tax collector turns out to be the good guy, and the attitude of the Pharisee is condemned.
Jesus tells us that the prayer of the tax collector got through to God and was effective, but that the prayer of the Pharisee went nowhere and did nothing. The difference between these two prayers came down to the difference between the two attitudes// the senses of self these two men had…..its important to know who you are when you’re talking to God:
The first thing you need to know is that you are created in the image of God, and that that is what makes communication with God (prayer) possible. It is the very first thing we learn in the bible, that we are created in God’s own image. Genesis tells us that god made the fish and the birds and all the other creatures that live in/on/above the earth … And gave them life. Then , as the ultimate act of creation….God made man and woman in his own image: and gifted them with memory/ reason/ skill.
And whether you are a creationist or an evolutionist – doesn’t matter – however the physical act of “making” was accomplished is not as important as the fact that God was the one who was doing the making.
The Pharisee knew the scriptures…there was no doubt in his mind that he was made in Gods image. But his words and his actions show us that he was unable to see the image of God in the tax collector – who was also praying in the temple that day.
But despite what the Pharisee may have believed, both men were made in the image of god >>> which is what made it possible for each of them to pray. Dogs and fish and birds (and all the other creatures which god created) are unable to pray// unable to communicate with God. They are unable to recognize god as their creator, but we can. Because we have been made in the image of that creator.
So that is the first thing we need to know about ourselves when we enter into prayer…we are made in the image of God, and are able to communicate with god.
The second thing we need to know is that sin (our deliberately doing something which goes against God’s will) can alienate us from god…and this is where the Pharisee ran into trouble. He was too quick to point out the sin in the life of the tax collector, while at the same time was unable to see the errors in his own life. It was this failure to see himself as he really was, that made his prayer ineffective.
The Pharisee had deceived himself >>> convinced himself that his life was fine == that there was nothing in his life that could be labelled as sinful/ wrong/ mistaken. He was even so bold that he thanked God that he had no sin……but the tax collector agonized over his own admission that he was a sinner. He knew who he was (a human, capable of making mistakes/sinning). But the Pharisee had no idea of his own self// who he really was. He didn’t recognize that (even though he was a respectable member of the religious community, and held a high position in society), sin was just as real in his life as it was in the life of the tax collector.
So when we pray, we also need to be aware of our own faults. And know that our sins/ our shortcomings/ our failure to live up to our responsibilities as God’s children can separate us from God………….you’ll notice i said “can” (not will or do). Because when we acknowledge them// admit they exist (and realize that we are human and not perfect) >>>> then we are opening up the lines of communication with God.
3] this brings us to the third thing we need to know about ourselves when we pray , that we are totally dependent on God to restore the relationship with us (that god’s love for us is unconditional … Its not something we earn or deserve). The Pharisee showed no sign of dependency on God when he prayed. The words he uttered only pushed God away and kept god at a distance. The Pharisee (and his prayer) were filled with his own sense of self-importance/ self-worth/ self-righteousness >>> an attitude which has no room for God.
Sure, his prayer began with the words “God, I thank you ” But in reality he was only thanking himself, not God. “I thank myself for being so much better than others and for being the kind of person that God just couldn’t get along without”. But (Jesus tells us) it was the tax collector who went home justified before God. Justified because he recognized that he was unable to do it by himself >>> that he just couldn’t go on without God.
4] this brings us to the final thing that we need to know about ourselves — that we are forgiven. When Jesus died, he died for each of us. He died so that we wouldn’t be damned for our mistakes/ sins/ … For being human. His death was the ultimate sacrifice to God. Bringing a total restoration and forgiveness for all (even those of us who would come along centuries later). And this forgiveness is a gift…freely given to each of us – simply because we are God’s children /// made in the image of God.
The Pharisee thought he could earn God’s respect. After all he was such a respectable man (he’d be the first to tell you so) >>>> he even told God that !!! But it was his pride and self-centered-ness which kept God out of his life (not by God’s choice — but by the Pharisee himself) the tax collector knew he had nothing with which to earn God’s favour…so he humbled himself before God and confessed his need for mercy. God heard his prayer and met his need. Jesus concluded the parable by saying : for all who exalt themselves will be humbled// but all who humble themselves will be exalted.
This was how Jesus lived his life…this is the example he set for us … An example we are urged to follow.
Today the gospel asks us : how are we doing??? Are we being faithful to the task set before us?
-how do we think we are doing?
-how do others thing we are doing?
(but most important of all)
-how do we think God thinks we are doing?
Copyright ©2016 by Rob Towler.